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Thread: Top 10 ways to look like a total toolbag

  1. #1
    Cigalert
    Copied from www.magnificentbastard.com
    posted:
    08.02.07
    Let's all try and avoid these devastating fashion faux pas.
    #1. Backwards Baseball Hat
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-01.jpg
    Do you play catcher for a major league ball club? Minor league? Local softball team? No? Then don't do this.
    #2. Oakley Blades
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-02.jpg
    Your Tour de France riding days are over, pal.
    #3. Bluetooth Headset
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-03.jpg
    1. Trust us, you're not that important.
    2. You're now just one-degree removed from Lando Calrissian's bald android assistant.
    #4. Gold Necklace
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-04.jpg
    Rap moguls, NBA stars, and Mr. T excluded. Some white guy from the 'burbs, nuh uh.
    #5. Tommy Bahama Shirt
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-05.jpg
    When in Hawaii, this is OK. In the upper 49, toolbag.
    #6. National Review Magazine
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-06.jpg
    In close association with bad style, bad politics.
    #7. Belt-clipped Cell Phone
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-07.jpg
    Scream "I am a middle manager!" a little louder. The guy across the street didn't hear you.
    #8. "cause" Wristband
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-08.jpg
    Exceptions made if you or immediate family member is battling various wristband maladies. Otherwise, grab a scissors.
    #9. over-the-knee double-pleated shorts
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-09.jpg
    Two things wrong here:
    1. 4 pleats.
    2. Over the knee.
    #10. Crocs
    http://www.magnificentbastard.com/im...toolbag-10.jpg
    he Zubaz of the '00s. Here's a good rule to live by: Never wear the same shoes as your 5-year-old nephew.

  2. #2
    '75 Miller
    #11...tattoo in what's tradionally a chick-tat spot. on the ankle , shoulder blade, or the new bandwagon tat location, small of the back....the "target" or "tramp stamp", if you will. j/k

  3. #3
    adjones419
    or the new bandwagon tat location, small of the back....the "target" or "tramp stamp"
    Might as well be a bullseye.

  4. #4
    fatboy95
    How about the sideways ball cap, pants lower than your butt cheeks, Raiders jersey, NBA shorts

  5. #5
    vee-driven
    Anybody that uses the shocker, your not cool and your a dork.

  6. #6
    Chipster27
    Ahh crap I'm not the toolbox, but maybe a drawer in the toolbox . But I live in Whitey Town so it's expected

  7. #7
    H20 Toie
    Figures i was given a Tommy Bahama shirt last week and i like it.
    Oh well guess im a tool

  8. #8
    Nord
    Backwards hat??

  9. #9
    TYLER DURDEN
    11. Board shorts and sunglasses with Flames.
    12. TRIBAL or BARBWIRE armband tattoo.

  10. #10
    River Lynchmob
    Tommy Bahama? Come on now.

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