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Mandelon
02-05-2005, 09:08 AM
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wiped a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. "What's the matter, dear?", she whispers as she steps into the room, "Why are you down here at this time of night?".
The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly. "Yes I do" she replies.
The husband paused. The words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father, the cop, caught us in the back seat of my car making love?" "Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.
The husband continued, "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for 20 years?" "I remember that too," she replied softly.
He wiped another tear from his cheek and said... "I would have gotten out today."
:messedup: :D :rolleyes: :p

Mandelon
02-05-2005, 09:13 AM
A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York, where a woman may
go to choose a husband from among many men. The store is comprised of 6
floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends
the flights.
There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may
choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back
down except to exit the building.
So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.
On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have
jobs.
The woman reads the sign and says to herself, "Well, that's better than my
last boyfriend, but I wonder what's further up?" So up she goes.
The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.
The woman remarks to herself, "That's great, but I wonder what's further
up?" And up she goes again.
The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and
are extremely good looking.
"Hmmm,............. better" she says. "But I wonder what's upstairs?" So
she ascends another flight of stairs.
The fourth floor sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are
extremely good looking and help with the housework.
"Wow!" exclaims the woman, "very tempting. BUT, there must be more, further
up!" And again she heads up another flight.
The fifth floor sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are
extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic
streak...sexy...great lovers.
"Oh, mercy me! But just think ... what must be awaiting me on the last
floor?" So up to the sixth floor she goes.
The sixth floor sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 3,456,789,012 to this
floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof
that women are impossible to please.

Debbolas
02-05-2005, 09:20 AM
lol :D

Mohavekid
02-05-2005, 09:49 AM
LOL
True too. :devil: