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*!Ken's Wife!*
09-07-2005, 04:13 PM
AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES
>
> 1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic.
> Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto. The
> blockage will be almost instantly removed.
>
>
> 2. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by
> getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
>
>
> 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the
> toilet seat by simply using the sink.
>
>
> 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut
> yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in
> your veins. Remember to use a timer.
>
>
> 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm
> clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep
> after you hit the snooze button.
>
>
> 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of
> laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
>
>
> 7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with
> a hammer and you will forget about t the toothache.
>
>
> Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are:
>
>
>
> You only need two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
> If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40.
> If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
>
>
> Remember:
> Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
>
>
> Never pass up an opportunity to go to the bathroom.
>
> If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get
> another chance.
>
> And finally, be really nice to your family and friends; you never
> know when you might need them to empty your bedpan.
>

atomickitn
09-07-2005, 04:15 PM
LMAO :rollside: :rollside: :rollside: :rollside:

liquidasset
09-07-2005, 04:19 PM
Now that there is funny. :eek:

Mrs.Racer277
09-07-2005, 04:23 PM
Thanks sweetie I needed a laugh today. :) :)

OGShocker
09-07-2005, 05:58 PM
5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm
clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep
after you hit the snooze button.
:hammerhea :hammerhea :hammerhea

Mrs. HOOTER SLED
09-07-2005, 06:06 PM
That was too funny................ :D

Redneck
09-08-2005, 07:12 AM
ill have to remember those

Mrs. Bordsmnj
09-08-2005, 07:15 AM
LOL!!! Cute just like you ;)

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 07:53 AM
well the good news is im on time, the bad news is my finger hurts like hell :crossx:

Miss Perfect
09-08-2005, 08:08 AM
well the good news is im on time, the bad news is my finger hurts like hell :crossx:
:D

Vada
09-08-2005, 08:33 AM
What did you do to his finger MP???

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 08:34 AM
What did you do to his finger MP???
it got stuck someplace that it should not have been! :D

Miss Perfect
09-08-2005, 08:35 AM
What did you do to his finger MP???
I needed someone to hold the vegetables while I chopped. Whoops!

Vada
09-08-2005, 08:35 AM
That's happened to you a few times, hasn't it??? :rolleyes:

Miss Perfect
09-08-2005, 08:36 AM
it got stuck someplace that it should not have been! :D
Not funny.... well ok, maybe a little funny :D

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 08:38 AM
That's happened to you a few times, hasn't it??? :rolleyes:
the last time i was at your house!...... :cool:

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 08:39 AM
Not funny.... well ok, maybe a little funny :D
that i can see as funny ! my finger missing !!!well ok a lil funny! :messedup:

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 08:40 AM
I TRY TO BE FUNNY ABOUT THE ALARM CLOCK AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN IT HAS TO BE ABOUT MP, she wont let me hold her veggies, i tried :yuk:

Miss Perfect
09-08-2005, 08:42 AM
I TRY TO BE FUNNY ABOUT THE ALARM CLOCK AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN IT HAS TO BE ABOUT MP, she wont let me hold her veggies, i tried :yuk:
Well there's no need to be getting all angry and shiat. Blame Vada, it was her fault. Damn Canatards! :p

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 08:48 AM
yah know, this is confusing, who do i need to blame for the finger, the jello really has made my memory crappy :confused: :devil: :D

Vada
09-08-2005, 08:52 AM
Well there's no need to be getting all angry and shiat. Blame Vada, it was her fault. Damn Canatards! :p
Blame Vada???????????????
what the hell did I do? So, I gotta a little tipsy on Friday. Who doesn't?

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 08:59 AM
ok you two, thats it, im coming to both of your houses bring jello of course. and kickin some ass :crossx: :crossx: :argue:

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:05 AM
ok you two, thats it, im coming to both of your houses bring jello of course. and kickin some ass :crossx: :crossx: :argue:
i think i'd be kissin some ass! :idea:

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:07 AM
kissin ass for what???????????? ah well.... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx :D

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:10 AM
you oughta start kissing my azz :D

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:13 AM
you oughta start kissing my azz :D
bring it on! :)

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:15 AM
alrighty....i'm bending over....make it good :p

cxr133
09-08-2005, 09:16 AM
R ]
U
N

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:17 AM
what??????????????

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:17 AM
alrighty....i'm bending over....make it good :p
with or with out tounge? i like tounge!, just in case i get a lil tase of the pie! :p

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:19 AM
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............................. ...LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
lmfao!!!!!!!!!!!

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:25 AM
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............................. ...LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
lmfao!!!!!!!!!!!
hummmmmmmmmmmm!!! either your not into that sort of thing(being the reciever) or your thinking of the wrong thing!!! :D

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:27 AM
there sure is alot of asskissin going on, i think we need pics :D :devil: :devil:

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:29 AM
the balls are in vada s court!!! :idea:

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:32 AM
I'm 782 pounds and damn sexay!!!!!!!!!! :cool:

*!Ken's Wife!*
09-08-2005, 09:32 AM
THREAD JACKERS!!!!
LOL How is everyone this morning?

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:33 AM
GOOD MORNIING!
I apoligize for everyone else's doings

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:34 AM
thread jackersssssss, yeah, and vada i got ten pounds on yah :D

*!Ken's Wife!*
09-08-2005, 09:36 AM
GOOD MORNIING!
I apoligize for everyone else's doings
I was just messin with you guys!! You're more than welcome to jack my threads anytime! *WINK*

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:36 AM
I'm 782 pounds and damn sexay!!!!!!!!!! :cool:
damm you skinny lil ho! :)

*!Ken's Wife!*
09-08-2005, 09:36 AM
thread jackersssssss, yeah, and vada i got ten pounds on yah :D
Oh yea? BRING IT!!! LOL I got a knuckle sandwhich waitin just for you!!!

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:37 AM
THREAD JACKERS!!!!
LOL How is everyone this morning?
dammmm! your honry! after getting 27.5 hrs of sleep arnt you? :)

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:39 AM
hear that? I'm allowed to jack threads :eat:

*!Ken's Wife!*
09-08-2005, 09:39 AM
dammmm! your honry! after getting 27.5 hrs of sleep arnt you? :)
I was KIDDING!!! Dang who pissed in your wheaties this mornin? :yuk:

*!Ken's Wife!*
09-08-2005, 09:40 AM
hear that? I'm allowed to jack threads :eat:
Only mine though.....*WINK*

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:41 AM
dam im hungry too, can i get oil and vinegar on that sandwich???? :skull:

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:41 AM
hear that? I'm allowed to jack threads :eat:
iv'e got some thing for you to jack!!! :idea:

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:41 AM
how about a little pickle juice with that oil?

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:42 AM
I'm fairly tall

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:43 AM
hey 5-4 isnt tall sweething

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:43 AM
I'm fairly tall
what ! about 5.2 ish ? :cool:

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:44 AM
hey 5-4 isnt tall sweething
I'm 5'8 little honey.....and by the way....don't think your all cool now cause your past 800 posts :burningm:

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:46 AM
AND LET ME TELL YOU WHY, mp,vada, thats why :D

atomickitn
09-08-2005, 09:46 AM
[QUOTE=Vada]I'm 5'8 little honey.....and by the way.... think your all cool now uuuuuummmmmmm! i like em tall that way ican talk to them and not there tits! :D

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:48 AM
and what's the matter with MP and myself????
:mad:
:wink:

Miss Perfect
09-08-2005, 09:50 AM
AND LET ME TELL YOU WHY, mp,vada, thats why :D
Why do you always have to bring my name into it? I'm just sitting here minding my own business! :D

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:51 AM
im just defending my honor. im an upstanding citizen ya know :devil:

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:51 AM
Why do you always have to bring my name into it? I'm just sitting here minding my own business! :D
Minding your own business my arse... :D
You're the one that started this whole thing :devil:

Mrs.charitycase
09-08-2005, 09:52 AM
LMAO!!!

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:52 AM
hey for my 1000th post im having a get naked run through the sprinkler jello shooter party :crossx:

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:53 AM
Well I'm glad someone is having fun :burningm:
:D :D :D

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:53 AM
wwwwwwwwwwwooooooooooohoooooooooooooooo, hey you mrscc :D

Miss Perfect
09-08-2005, 09:54 AM
wwwwwwwwwwwooooooooooohoooooooooooooooo, hey you mrscc :D
She has the perfect tounge for jello shooters! :devil:

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:55 AM
Be careful Mrs. CC....76Anthony likes to peep in windows :p

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 09:57 AM
i do no such thing, address please, it helps :D

Vada
09-08-2005, 09:58 AM
He peeps in my windows every Tuesday

Mrs.charitycase
09-08-2005, 09:59 AM
wwwwwwwwwwwooooooooooohoooooooooooooooo, hey you mrscc :D
Hi!

Mrs.charitycase
09-08-2005, 10:00 AM
Be careful Mrs. CC....76Anthony likes to peep in windows :p
LMAO!!!!

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 10:03 AM
TUESDAY, you must have another peeper, im friday and sunday :yuk:

Vada
09-08-2005, 10:05 AM
uh oh....now i've got a Tuesday peeper I don't know about :2purples:

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 10:08 AM
twotimer :mad:

Vada
09-08-2005, 10:09 AM
what are you getting mad at me for?

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 10:10 AM
because you just show your wears to anyone :mad:

Vada
09-08-2005, 10:11 AM
because you just show your wears to anyone :mad:
I thought it was you though :umm:

76ANTHONY
09-08-2005, 10:16 AM
it might have been, the vodka's got my days all screwed up..... :wink: