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View Full Version : Something To Offend Everyone!



Cole
10-18-2005, 02:43 PM
SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE!
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball
> > Juan on Juan
> > What is a Yankee?
> > The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it
> alone.
> > What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ?
> > The position of the dirt bag
> > Why is divorce so expensive?
> > Because it's worth it.
> > What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy
> bends over?
> > Doughnuts?
> > Why is air a lot like sex?
> > Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any
> > What do you call a smart blonde?
> > A golden retriever.
> > What do attorneys use for birth control?
> > Their personalities.
> > What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
> > 45 lbs
> > What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
> > 45 minutes
> > What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
> > Through his chest with a sharp knife.
> > Why do men want to marry virgins?
> > They can't stand criticism.
> > Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
> > Because those men already have boyfriends.
> > What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
> > After a year, the dog is still excited to see you
> > What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
> > The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
> > Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
> > Because they have cotton balls.
> > What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
> > A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
> > What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
> > "Are you sure it's mine?"
> > Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
> > Mace will do that to you.
> > Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
> > Everyone has the same DNA.
> > Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
> > Breasts don't have eyes.
> > Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
> > He walks around saying "Yo."
> >
> > Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car
only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
> > Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.
> > Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
> > A different bar.
> > Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
> > They named him "Sum Ting Wong
> > What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
> > A speech impediment.
> > What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
> > They're hiring.
> > What's the difference between a southern zoo and
> a northern zoo?
> > A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... "a recipe".
> > How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
> > Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
> > What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
> > A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale
> > begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit..."
> > Why is there no Disneyland in China ?
> > No one's tall enough to go on the good rides
>

ACCEPTENCE
10-18-2005, 02:49 PM
That's good, I like it :D

termiteguy
10-18-2005, 02:56 PM
lol :D :D :D

Garrddogg
10-18-2005, 02:58 PM
Those were great!!

Kim Hanson
10-18-2005, 03:04 PM
Funny chit...........( . )( . )................. :D :D

***boateditor
10-18-2005, 03:05 PM
Why is there no Disneyland in China?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides
This riddle became officially antiquated in September.
Click here (http://snipurl.com/ingi)

JB in so cal
10-18-2005, 03:06 PM
This riddle became officially antiquated in September.
Click here (http://snipurl.com/ingi)
Everyone's a critic :rolleyes:

76ANTHONY
10-18-2005, 03:15 PM
hahahaha disneyland hahahaha :D

MAINEVENT
10-18-2005, 03:22 PM
Lmao :d

***boateditor
10-18-2005, 03:26 PM
Everyone's a critic :rolleyes:
But fortunately, not an ignoramus.

Mike.A
10-18-2005, 03:27 PM
Heres one for the crowd.
What does NASA stand for ?
Need another seven astronauts
:eek:
Hey, dont shoot the messenger.

SmokinLowriderSS
10-18-2005, 05:09 PM
I'm offended. :wink: