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Excessive Force
11-18-2006, 04:18 PM
To what extent has anyone on here went with their "bad kids"? For example, letting them get arrested for their own good, calling cops on them when they needed to....stuff along those lines.
My live in gf has a "bad kid". perhaps the way they were raised has to do with it. Point is they live with me, gf and 2kids. oldest daughter hates "authority". Anyhow, she is a slob and i just get tired of getting on their asses about things, chores etc.
This may sound petty to you guys but someone left the cereal out this AM, shiot like this always happens, and noone will fess up to it, so i punished all of them. grounded them for a few days. Well problematic daughter(17.8 yrs. old)....She calls mom to let her no about what just happened and told mom she needs to do something about it. This lil bitch daughter of hers talks to her like that all the time. Daughter tells me she wont be grounded cuz she didnt do it. Basically laughs. I tell her to keep it up, disobey my grounding and first thing in May when her bday is, she WILL be out on the street.
Lil history, shes been arrested for GTA when she was like 14-15. spent few montsh in juvy, which semi straightened her out. Still has a problem w people telling her what to do.
Im just the BF, they live with me. Anyhow i told mom that i would call the cops and declare her a runaway, which if done enough, will lland her back in juvy...i think.
What else can i do short of getting my ass arrested?...HELP!!!....TIA

ratso
11-18-2006, 04:23 PM
Mom needs to get control... or boot them all out. No ass is worth that bullshit.

ratso
11-18-2006, 04:25 PM
She is too far gone and there is no changing it now... blame the mom and/or her dad. Basically you will have to accept this behavior, under YOUR OWN roof, if the mom is unwilling to get some control over her...

acatitude
11-18-2006, 04:25 PM
been there, done that. your going down a one way street. If mom wont do anything then you cant cuzz at some point it will be a aurgument btweeb you and g/f. tell her straighten her daughter out or leave. and stick to it, because I gaurantee you it will happen down the road anyways. I told my ex g/f I wouldnt accept that from my kids and I surely wont from hers soooooo poof they were gone

Jbb
11-18-2006, 04:29 PM
Go out for a pack of cigarettes.......and dont come back......ever.... :220v:

Excessive Force
11-18-2006, 04:30 PM
been there, done that. your going down a one way street. If mom wont do anything then you cant cuzz at some point it will be a aurgument btweeb you and g/f. tell her straighten her daughter out or leave. and stick to it, because I gaurantee you it will happen down the road anyways. I told my ex g/f I wouldnt accept that from my kids and I surely wont from hers soooooo poof they were gone
Daughter says she wants out anyway at 18, thank God. I just need something to get by..for now till shes 18. I feel like shes trying to do the same to me as she does to her mom, by ignoring her punishment. Quite frankly i wanna beat her ass. :mad: scrap style not a spank on the butt.

Excessive Force
11-18-2006, 04:32 PM
maybe some LE advice would be appreciated.

YeLLowBoaT
11-18-2006, 04:36 PM
say ok you want out... lets get your mom and go to the court house and get you amanspated. Make sure that you explain to her that you will not be giving her a dime, she will have no place to stay and no job.
That and you might want to go to the local recruiting office and tell them, she wants to join( all of them of corse) and make sure you get all the pamplets you can. Nothing like the armed forces to straiten them out real fast. Some ppl really need that.( sounds like she does.)

stoker
11-18-2006, 04:36 PM
At 17 years old the cops won't do anything if she runs away. Let her do it, and be done with her. :)

38687
11-18-2006, 05:43 PM
Duct tape her to a chair and put her in the basement till she eighteen. Just dont forget to feed her and change the bucket under the chair once a aweek. If that doesnt work nothing will.

ratso
11-18-2006, 05:59 PM
Daughter says she wants out anyway at 18, thank God. I just need something to get by..for now till shes 18. I feel like shes trying to do the same to me as she does to her mom, by ignoring her punishment. Quite frankly i wanna beat her ass. :mad: scrap style not a spank on the butt.
She will still be a burden after she moves out...

Mandelon
11-18-2006, 06:11 PM
Post a pic. Maybe's she worth the wait..... :crossx:

mickeyfinn
11-18-2006, 06:44 PM
My brother got strung out on drug pretty bad when we were kids. Had a rehab prgram that was recommended by LE. Since he was over 16 the only way they would take him was by court order. Parents laid ot a $5.00 bill and turned on cam-corder. He took it, parents called LE. (this was all pre-arranged) Petty theft judge ordered re-had. Worked out real well.

IMPATIENT 1
11-18-2006, 06:55 PM
anything you do to the kid will surely affect yours and the kid's mom. if she's just a gf and you don't think "she might be the 1", i say cut your loses and dump the chick. what happens if the bad kid really starts to rebel against your rules when she's 18, and doesn't have to mind, and the mother doesn't do anything about it then?? that situation is gonna end bad too! is the father of the kids decent enough for the "bad kid" to go live with?

bchbum
11-18-2006, 07:26 PM
Is the gf worth all this ? Just think what/ who the girl might bring to your house when she's 18 .Just don't be alone with this girl, you never know what she might say you tried to do .

YeLLowBoaT
11-18-2006, 07:29 PM
15 posts and no one has said anything about a mother duagther threeway yet.... HB is sliping....

Excessive Force
11-18-2006, 09:11 PM
My brother got strung out on drug pretty bad when we were kids. Had a rehab prgram that was recommended by LE. Since he was over 16 the only way they would take him was by court order. Parents laid ot a $5.00 bill and turned on cam-corder. He took it, parents called LE. (this was all pre-arranged) Petty theft judge ordered re-had. Worked out real well.
Hmmmmmmm

Excessive Force
11-18-2006, 09:14 PM
Nice advice. There is no way in HELL this lil biotch is going to be here past the age of 18. If mom dont want her out, at that point ill put them both out. She would have to do more than just obey my rules :rolleyes:
This is going to get interesting. Kids never had a firm hand when they were growing up. Now that they have one they prob dont know what the funk to do!

Flyinbowtie
11-18-2006, 09:22 PM
Juvenile Justice System is going to do nothing to a 17 yr. old.
Emancipation proceedings can take months, she will be 18 befroe they would be completed.
IMHO and in my experience, there is nothing you or anyone else can do to this person short of incarceration that is going to change her behavior at this point in life. You and your G.F. must come to an agreement that this kid is out the door on her 18th B-day, and pre-plan how you are going to handle it when she pops up within 6 months, and is either in custody, pregnant, or in other pending major trouble, asking for you to fix it.
Or worse.
If you love her mom, then it is hard to decide where the absolute line is, but you need to find it, because this young woman is going to be a negative fixture in your lives until you decide together to stop it. Think, for a minute, about the liability she poses to you while living under your roof.
If you and mom cannot get on the absolute same wave length on this, then I am afraid your relationship is going to be a tough one, at best.
Good Luck.

SmokinLowriderSS
11-19-2006, 02:04 AM
She will still be a burden after she moves out...
ONLY if you permit her to be. If you permit her to be, it's your own damn fault.
My wife had 4 kids that predated me, 2 boys, 2 girls, we have none together. Fortunately for THE WIFE, we see very much eye-to-eye on those things.
the 2 boys, each separately, in their mid teens decided they were going to do pretty much as they wished.
The older one just to run arround with friends and maybe show up at home, maybe not for a week or so. After having him hauled home several times by the cops, he was "permitted" to go live with his uncle out of state, who managed to get him reasonably straight thru school and out into the employed world.
His younger brother decided to smoke some weed and do similar stuff, as he wished, and we burned him for THAT. He was "allowed" to avoid OUR wrath by going to live the last 2 of his school years with HIS father (a real looser azzhole, who was nowhere nearly as good to the kid as mom & I, which he realized after a while, but was not permitted to return here), and HE has managed to make it thru high school, and get resonably straightened out, employed, and shows a decent ammount of promise to not be a burden to society.
The girls were inperfect, but were not this level of trouble either, except the oldest one (17 at the time) having an 8-day/night party while we were on vacation in 2003. We very nearly had her arrested as accessory to the burglary that went on (4 bar neon signs and 3 mirrors stolen, 2 broken vehicle windows (about $3000 total damages)). She came within about 1" of being thrown out of the house that night and when we were done ripping her a new ass, she called the cops to make the theft reports to the responding Sherrif's deputy. (nothing ever returned but the kid instantly learned a new respect for Mom & I's home turf and our united willingness to defend it).
Her younger sister (who was here at the time) was in deep doo-doo too, for obeying her sister by NOT rating her out to us by phone, and SHE has been zero real trouble.
I knew mom 4 years before the wedding, lived with her for 3, knew the kids most of that time, and even though she has (as I have told the kids on several occasions) the ability to override me on a punnishment issue, she has NEVER seen fit to do it. Mom basically uses me as "the hammer" to enforce what she wants (which we usually agree on) without her having to be "the mean one", it works for us as a system.
Bottom line:
If the Gf (mom) is unwilling to meet you reasonably on behavior rules (everyone disagrees from time to time) for the problematic children, write it off and somebody hits the street, call it a "learning experience" for you.
If mom is amenable to you in her willingness to assist you in house rule enforcement, then do so, and hammer the attitudinal kids as needed.
The teens do have it tough in trying to figure out their enlarging place in the world, trying to take more responsibilities, trying to assert their independance yet at the same time stil being stuck under the perent's thumb. Some make a smoother transition than others.
There is an awful lot of stuff in this house that "nobody did", and that will never change, we voiced our disapproval, our frustration, chewing out and grounding kids as we saw fit, and never really got THAT one stopped. Oh well. much less nowadays and we wrote it off to history now. Only 1 kid left regularly in the household, age 16, and she knows ALL the scores by her elder siblings (the youngest one of the 4)

centerhill condor
11-19-2006, 04:37 AM
Go out for a pack of cigarettes.......and dont come back......ever.... :220v:
make mine marlboro reds..oh and a pack of wooden matches, thanks!
Don't drag yourself into the drama that will surely follow. You'll wind up arrested for something and who's gonna bail you out? that's right, nobody! :)

sorry dog
11-19-2006, 05:10 AM
Go out for a pack of cigarettes.......and dont come back......ever.... :220v:
My sister has been asking me for your new number??

vdrivenman
11-19-2006, 05:26 AM
next thing i see is your being contacted by the local LE telling you you are under investigation for some alleged sexual assault or something of that nature.
you will be fighting the the whole damn bunch,with the conjured up stories and lies. we see it all the time and mean while you're screwed.
a losing battle that was already lost. a mothers love for a child is a hard thing to compete againist!
is it worth it ????

BreastManWins
11-19-2006, 06:33 AM
And you gave up masturbation for all this? Why?!

burtandnancy
11-19-2006, 07:53 AM
You are so screwed. There is absolutely no hope for a long term relationship with your GF. Time to talk it over and move her on. It'll hurt for a while, but as the country song says, "...brand new girlfriend"...

catman-do
11-19-2006, 08:01 AM
I go with every one else. Leave the gf and all your problems will go away. Obviously the lady has no control over the kids, and probably not much over her life in general. I was a bad kid, parents sent me to juvy 2 times and then the courts sent me to summer at a "childrens style boot camp". It turned me around somewhat, enough for me to join CAP at a young age. They found i liked hockey and during the season was the only time i wasnt really getting in trouble. So they would encourage me to play ALL-THE-TIME!! I ended up playing 24-7 and got good enough to play in the minors out of highschool. Maybe find something she likes and encourage that. She will respect you more

wsuwrhr
11-19-2006, 08:09 AM
Mom needs to get control... or boot them all out. No ass is worth that bullshit.
A M E N Ratso.
Not worth a single headache, I don't care what the mom looks like. If SHE doesn't step up to discipline her own kids she needs to go too.
Brian

Ralph Brunt
11-19-2006, 08:49 AM
Lykis 101 dump that bit--

wsuwrhr
11-19-2006, 08:51 AM
Lykis 101 dump that bit--
Where was lykis 5 years ago?

ECeptor
11-19-2006, 10:54 AM
Leave the gf and go bang a stipper...you'll feel much better guaranteed!