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hoolign
03-05-2007, 05:59 AM
A heart warming story of one man..his dreams ..and .. monster rack!
Bilge cinematics in cahoots ( after many hoots) with Hooli's creative concepts proudly present .. da da da daaaaa..da..da...da..da.daaaaaaa
" Brown rubs out more than he can chew"
It was a typical day for Tom and Alison as they were enjoying their weekend after noon in there quaint new cabin. Tom being the restless type ventured off on a hike through the woods. While standing back and enjoying the nature, Tom spotted an old shack amongst the evergreens surrounding their property. Being the curious type he ventured into the decrepit old cabin. Typical items were strewn about the run down abode, an old wood stove, some old news papers lying on a table with a broken leg. While kicking around the debris on the floor Tom heard a clang, a very unusual clang. Lifting some broken boards off the item he stood back in amazement...an old brass lamp was in the rubble. Picking it up, and admiring his new found treasure Tom began wiping some of the dust and tarnish off the lamp when all of a sudden.. Kaploooie..a genie emerged ..not just any genie,..but one that appeared in the form Â…it canÂ’t beÂ…itÂ’s impossible ..itÂ’sÂ…itÂ’s Â…460
http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/977/460geniefz7.gif
"Why have you disturbed me foo" Said the genie.. "I...I...I'm sorry... I didn't realize you were in there" "freaking bench racers" spouted the 460 "here's the deal slim..I'll give you three wishes and you don't pester me again..got it?" roared the genie "fine" mumbled Tom " "for my first wish I want a million dollars" POOF there was a million in cash on the table. "second I want Topless to have a monster rack" POOF .. a skin curdling scream could be heard in the distance..Tom grinned from ear to ear! Third I want a big boat with a Phat sound system in it! " POOF ..”SPLASHHH” .. Tom rushed to the open door and could see a brand new Fountain bobbing at he shoreline. “OK fool..I'm crashin..don't ever bother me again!" Tom ran to the shoreline as fast as his legs would carry him, and when he got close … ,”WTF?? RattlecanLou was sitting in the baot singing everybody wang chung tonight at the top of his lungs. “What are you doing here you fat halfnaked bastard?” Tom shrieked at RattleCan Lou.”Damned if I know” said Lou with a puzzled look on his face” I was just minding my own business scratching my balls on the couch and all of a sudden Kaplooie..here I am?” “Some phat sound system that 460 foo hooked me up with” Tom mumbled as he put two ear plugs in and shrugged it off and hopped in the new Fountain with his new pal singing at the top of his lungs and mashed throttle for the middle of the lake. The two new best friends were smiling like never before Tom raced back and forth up and down the lake with nothing but speed on their minds…
http://img70.imageshack.us/img70/9022/16oq5.jpg
Tom was so exited that he had to show Alison his new toy. He headed for shore as fast as he could. Getting closer and closer to shore he started laying on the horn to get Alison’s attention. As soon as he got close enough Alison was running out of the cabin towards the shore. “WTF?? Said Tom aloud “Oh My bloody God he screamed” as he looked to the shoreline where Alison was standing with her new rack.
http://img129.imageshack.us/img129/5864/antlerski1.jpg
“Holy shit” thought Tom as he realized that wasn’t what he was thinking of when he wished for her to get a new rack.”look at the rack on that bitch “slobbered Lou.. “ Shut up you fat half naked bastard..and tuck your ball in their sloppin all over the place”. While Lou arranged his nutsack …Tom pulled into shore and took Alison into the cabin to comfort her the best he could. Tom sat his weeping and distraught wife down making sure hear antlers didn’t get caught in the ceiling fan.
”Dear I have something I need to tell you” stuttered Tom “ I went for a walk and found a beat ol cabin, and inside an old lamp. When I tried to clean the lamp out came this Genie who I would swear is that 460 guy. He gave me three wishes, I wished for amillion dollars in cash and POOF there it was. I wished for a new boat..and there it was and one of them was for you to have a monster rack”
“ YOU STUPID SON OF A BITCH. WITH A MILLION DOLLARS YOU COULD HAVE BOUGHT ME TITS “ Tom just stared at her antlers in disbelief “.I’LL RIP YOUR BALLSACK OFF YOU TWISTED WHEAT FOR BRAINS SACK OF GOATSHIT” Tom ran for his life to the boat and made a hasty get away to safety.
Alison ran to the cabin and confronted 460 about his wish granting episode with Tom “ When she entered the cabin 460 was just floating around singing ABBA'A greatest hits. Volume 2 .
http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/977/460geniefz7.gif
What in the hell we’re you thinking you bastard??” bellowed Alison “GET THESE DAMN THINGS OF MY HEAD OR I’LL KICK THE EVER LOVING SHIT OUTTA YOU” she threatened. “And while your at it, I want you to wreck that bastard Browns day!”
Tom suddenly felt a strange feeling come over him .. then his friend Rattle can Lou started vanishing and reappearing lie a bad case of acne..
http://img66.imageshack.us/img66/5755/brownjx8.gif
Then all of a sudden PRESTO CA FLOOIE the Fountain turned into a.into a …Pumpkin?? Oh well” sighed Tom..may as well make the best of it.. and he happily cruised in his CP ( Carlson Pumpkin) 4 until he got tired and headed to the dock.
http://img520.imageshack.us/img520/8102/brownpumpkin01za4.jpg
Tom tied up and hopped out of his pumpkin boat while everyone laughed at him..wandered away and found Rattle Can Lou picking through a garbage can looking for some thing.
http://media1.break.com/dnet/media/2007/3/feb28gal02.jpg
“whatcha doin Lou” asked Tom “ I was looking for empties but I found this old lamp in here….
To be continued

Jbb
03-05-2007, 07:38 AM
LMAO......:D :D
Great start to the week!

Baja Big Dog
03-05-2007, 08:03 AM
Fricken Hooli....hard to believe that you write childrens stories for a living.....at least thats what EAZYKILLER told us!!LOL:D

RaceFace
03-05-2007, 08:19 AM
Hooli's on a roll again!!! Look out!! LMFAO!!!

Jbb
03-05-2007, 09:22 AM
Quality avatar material right there....:D
http://img520.imageshack.us/img520/8102/brownpumpkin01za4.jpg

Biglue
03-05-2007, 09:46 AM
Lmao.

topless
03-05-2007, 09:57 AM
I'm so honored to be in this story but my new rack makes me a little top heavy.

photo chick
03-05-2007, 10:05 AM
I'm so honored to be in this story but my new rack makes me a little top heavy.
Bet you never thought the new rack would give you such a headache eeh?:D
Good luck finding a bathing suit for those

topless
03-05-2007, 10:07 AM
Bet you never thought the new rack would give you such a headache eeh?:D
Good luck finding a bathing suit for thoseI guess I could just go topless.:eek:

photo chick
03-05-2007, 10:17 AM
I guess I could just go topless.:eek:
That's right!!!! You can save money on buying the tops!!! You're so smart!! Wish I could do that....Maybe I should get a rack like you too;)

topless
03-05-2007, 10:21 AM
That's right!!!! You can save money on buying the tops!!! You're so smart!! Wish I could do that....Maybe I should get a rack like you too;)Just go find a genie.:D :D

photo chick
03-05-2007, 10:22 AM
Just go find a genie.:D :D
FOSITTY where are you? I need a nice rack like Topless:)

Rattle Can Lou
03-05-2007, 11:01 AM
Funny Shiat except for the garbage can dealio. I don't wear boxers. I am a karaoke king though. I do a mean "mack the knife"....

hoolign
03-05-2007, 05:06 PM
I can only take partial Credit, Bilge send the chops of Brown in the DCP and we both rolled on it from there over a few days. Bilge is the chop Guru! :D

topless
03-05-2007, 05:59 PM
I can only take partial Credit, Bilge send the chops of Brown in the DCP and we both rolled on it from there over a few days. Bilge is the chop Guru! :DThat was about the funniest thing I've seen all day. How's the giraffe?

hoolign
03-05-2007, 06:16 PM
That was about the funniest thing I've seen all day. How's the giraffe?
The sequal is due out in a month or so, nice rack Top ( Did you notice how your name was spelled ? ) :D Glad ya like it!
giraffe is spent! He just got home an hour ago after 2 weeks at work :D
the sequal is due out in a month or so :D

photo chick
03-06-2007, 10:25 AM
Bump.....not sure 460 has seen this yet:D

Jbb
03-06-2007, 10:27 AM
Bump.....not sure 460 has seen this yet:D
Brown is floating around ......in a great big.....melon....:D

hoolign
03-06-2007, 10:36 AM
Brown is floating around ......in a great big.....melon....:D
Browns DCP !

Dave C
03-06-2007, 11:37 AM
LMAO....
Top's rack has me busting at the seams..... LOL

lucky
03-06-2007, 01:48 PM
lue has balls ??? lmao :D hooli rocks

hoolign
03-07-2007, 10:38 PM
bmp for Tom

hoolign
05-14-2007, 06:46 AM
read this again this mornin and had to bump it :D

SB
05-14-2007, 06:54 AM
Still funny, a timeless classic. :D

photo chick
05-14-2007, 06:55 AM
When's the sequel coming out?

rocket98
05-14-2007, 07:15 AM
That was great.Thanks for putting a smile on my face.

2forcefull
05-14-2007, 07:22 AM
some people have way too much time on their hands, that's a good thing!
thanks for all the laughs!!

hoolign
05-14-2007, 07:27 AM
some people have way too much time on their hands, that's a good thing!
thanks for all the laughs!!
If we had "Way to much" time on our hands... it would have been a wmv file :D

TAF
05-14-2007, 07:48 AM
FOSITTY where are you? I need a nice rack like Topless:)
He may end up get'n you a set of ski racks:) :eek: :sqeyes:

Run_em_Hard
05-14-2007, 10:07 AM
I say we take it to Sundance
Now there is an idea:idea: Get noticed and POOF!! Sold for a million:D