Official Goof on the Canadians Thread!

[Boatcop]

Rather than take random pot-shots at Brown, Hooli, Canuck, Kim, et al, I figured we needed a place where we could rag on them all at once. ;) :D
http://www.sharyamarie.com/images/palmpilot.jpg
http://www.rivrep.com/articles/images/stories/jokes/canadian_mafia.gif
I mean, what are they going to do? Invade us? :D :D
Oh yeah.
RD SUX :D

[yopengo]

CANADIANS IN HELL
Two guys from Toronto die and wake up in hell.
The next day the devil stops in to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and toques warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?"
The two guys reply, "Well, you know, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh."
The devil decides that these two aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat.
The next morning he stops in again and there they are, still dressed in parkas, toques and mittens. The devil asks them again, "It's awfully hot down here, can't you guys feel it?"
Again the two guys reply, "Well, like we told ya yesterday, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh."
This gets the devil a little steamed up and he decides to fix these two guys. He cranks the heat up as high as it will go. The people are wailing and screaming everywhere. He stops by the room with the two guys from Canada and finds them in light jackets and bucket hats, grilling sausage and drinking beer.
The devil is astonished, "Everyone down here is in abject misery, and you two seem to be enjoying yourselves."
The two Canadians reply, "Well, ya know, we don't get too much warm weather up there in Toronto so we've just got to have a cook-out when the weather's THIS nice."
The devil is absolutely furious, he can hardly see straight. Finally he comes up with the answer. The two guys love the heat because they have been cold all their lives. The devil decides to turn all the heat off in hell.
The next morning, the temperature is below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere; people are shivering so bad that they are unable to do anything but wail, moan and gnash their teeth.
The devil smiles and heads for the room with the two Canadians.
He gets there and finds them back in their parkas, toques, and mittens. NOW they are jumping up and down, cheering, yelling and screaming like mad men!!!
The devil is dumbfounded, "I don't understand, when I turn up the heat you're happy. Now it's freezing cold and you're still happy. What is wrong with you two???"
The Torontonians look at the devil in surprise, "Well, don't you know? If Hell freezes over, it must mean the Leafs have won the Stanley Cup."
:D

[yopengo]

Two Canadians are sitting in a bar, and getting bored. They decide to play 20 questions. The first Canadian tries to think of a word and after a little pondering comes up with the word: moosecock.
The second Canadian tries his first question, "Is it something good to eat?"
The first guy thinks a moment then laughs and replies "Sure, I suppose you could eat it."
The second Canadian says, "Is it a moosecock?
:D

[hoolign]

Blashphemy! :mad:

[rrrr]

Here's hoolign, Kim Hanson, and Canuck1 going for more Molson's....
http://www.***boat.com/image_center/data/520/109Canadians_going_for_beer.jpg

[Kim Hanson]

You have my attention, got something else though cause that shit is old......( . )( . )................:idea:
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=27991&stc=1&d=1175657422

[Tom Brown]

Here's hoolign, Kim Hanson, and Canuck1 going for more Molson's....
http://www.***boat.com/image_center/data/520/109Canadians_going_for_beer.jpg
That guy in the middle looks uncomfortable. :D

[hoolign]

You have my attention, got something else though cause that shit is old......( . )( . )................:idea:
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=27991&stc=1&d=1175657422
Oh great ..our ambassador to alcholism takes the stand! :D

[hoolign]

CANADIANS IN HELL
Two guys from Toronto die and wake up in hell.
The next day the devil stops in to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and toques warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?"
The two guys reply, "Well, you know, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh."
The devil decides that these two aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat.
The next morning he stops in again and there they are, still dressed in parkas, toques and mittens. The devil asks them again, "It's awfully hot down here, can't you guys feel it?"
Again the two guys reply, "Well, like we told ya yesterday, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh."
This gets the devil a little steamed up and he decides to fix these two guys. He cranks the heat up as high as it will go. The people are wailing and screaming everywhere. He stops by the room with the two guys from Canada and finds them in light jackets and bucket hats, grilling sausage and drinking beer.
The devil is astonished, "Everyone down here is in abject misery, and you two seem to be enjoying yourselves."
The two Canadians reply, "Well, ya know, we don't get too much warm weather up there in Toronto so we've just got to have a cook-out when the weather's THIS nice."
The devil is absolutely furious, he can hardly see straight. Finally he comes up with the answer. The two guys love the heat because they have been cold all their lives. The devil decides to turn all the heat off in hell.
The next morning, the temperature is below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere; people are shivering so bad that they are unable to do anything but wail, moan and gnash their teeth.
The devil smiles and heads for the room with the two Canadians.
He gets there and finds them back in their parkas, toques, and mittens. NOW they are jumping up and down, cheering, yelling and screaming like mad men!!!
The devil is dumbfounded, "I don't understand, when I turn up the heat you're happy. Now it's freezing cold and you're still happy. What is wrong with you two???"
The Torontonians look at the devil in surprise, "Well, don't you know? If Hell freezes over, it must mean the Leafs have won the Stanley Cup."
:D
:D hell will never freeze over that far!

[yopengo]

:D hell will never freeze over that far!
Go Ducks :D :eek: :D

[HOOTER SLED-]

LOL....funny ass shit eh!!:D

[hoolign]

Go Ducks :D :eek: :D
You spelled Canucks wrong?? :confused:

[racecar.hotshoe]

http://andrew.serff.net/uploads/CanadianHumor/Gods%20Creatures.jpg

[hoolign]

http://andrew.serff.net/uploads/CanadianHumor/Gods%20Creatures.jpg
Amen! :D

[yopengo]

There are three guys walking together, a Newfie, a Quebecer, and a Vancouver guy.
They come across a lantern and a genie pops out.
(I will give you each one wish, that's three wishes.)
So the Newfie says (I am a fisherman, my dad's a fisherman, and his dad was a fisherman, and my son will be one too. I want all the oceans full of fish)
Like that, the oceans were full.
The Quebecer was amazed, he said (I want a wall around Quebec, so no one will get in.)
And like that, there was a wall around Quebec.
The Vancouver guy says (Tell me more about this wall.)
The genie says (Well its about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out.)
So the Vancouver guy says (Fill it up with water.)

[yopengo]

Can I still do this if I am Canadian…well sort of? :)

[Boatcop]

http://www.iwantnetware.com/canadian_keyboard.jpg
http://www.mtsu.edu/~hytonks/Canuck.jpg
http://img15.photobucket.com/albums/v45/Mr.Griffin2/canadasucks.png

[yopengo]

A Newfie went into the fish market to apply for a job. The boss thought to himself, "I'm not hiring that lazy newf", so he decided to set a test for the Newfie hoping he wouldn't be able to answer the questions and he'd be able to refuse him the job without getting into an argument.
The first question was, "Without using numbers, represent the number 9."
Newfie says, "Dat's easy" and proceeds to draw three trees.
The boss says, "What in the world is that?"
Newfie says, "Tree 'n tree 'n tree makes nine."
"Fair enough" says the boss.
"Second question, same rules, but represent 99".
Newfie stares into space for a while, then makes a smudge on each tree.
"Der ya go bye," he says.
The boss scratches his head and asks, "How on earth do you get that to represent 99?"
Newfie answers, "Each tree is dirty now, so it's dirty tree 'n dirty tree 'n dirty tree - dat 99."
The boss is getting worried he's going to have to hire the newf so he says, "All right, question number 3. Same rules again, but this time represent the number 100."
Newfie stares into space again, then he shouts, "I got it!" He makes a little mark at the base
of each tree and says, "Der ya go sir -100."
The boss looks at Newfie's attempt and thinks, "Ha! got him this time."
He then tells Newfie, "Go on, Newfie, you must be crazy if you think that represents a 100."
Newfie leans forward and points to the little marks at the tree bases and says, "A little dog comes along and craps by each tree, so now ya got dirty tree an' a turd, dirty tree an' a turd, and dirty tree an' a turd, which makes 100. When do I start me job?" :D :D :D

[BajaMike]

I don't think it's politically correct to pick on Canadians.......:idea:
Oh, F that Shiat....that's some pretty funny stuff!!!:D :D
:)

[73kona455]

Hooli's wife sent him to Blockbuster to rent "The Scent of a Woman"
He came back with "A Fish Called Wanda"
:D :) :D :) :)

[RitcheyRch]

Some funny stuff.

[SB]

Plenty of Canucks spend 6 months a year here in FL. I like to make fun of them:"So you're a refugee? Fleeing the oppressive regime in Canada?"
Here we have part of a Canadian fertility ritual.