Things to do at WalMart while your wife is shopping

[rrrr]

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4 . Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone 'Code 3' in Housewares . and see what happens.
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say
"PICK ME! PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices
again!!!"
15. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while and then yell loudly, "Hey there's no toilet paper in here!"
:D :D

[Jetdriver]

LMAO Ill have to try those!

[JetBoatRich]

All great suggestions:D
When we go there I try to make the best of it, make fun of crap there, etc. I can use these new ideas, I may not be invited again:D

[gigamurph]

Originally posted by JetBoatRich
All great suggestions:D
When we go there I try to make the best of it, make fun of crap there, etc. I can us these new ideas, I may not be invited again:D You get invited to Wal-Mart? That that HAS to make you the "King of the Rednecks"! I beg your forgiveness for not recognizin' royalty the last time we met!:p
I now bow in your presence. Actually, I'm bent over from laughin so much! You get invited to Wal-Mart!:D

[jackpunx]

I'm bent over from laughin so much
Be Carfull .. I saw the way Jeff was looking at you the other night:D

[gigamurph]

Originally posted by jackpunx
Be Carfull .. I saw the way Jeff was looking at you the other night:D Ah crap! I guess I better learn that "secret Lavey handshake" they spoke of over on that unmentionable website!:p

[rvrtoy]

LMAO...I will try some of these!!:D

[Keithb87]

When I go shopping with my Mom, I still will let her get ahead of me and then I 'll yell with a retarded tone.....Dragging one foot....
MOMMY MOMMY DON"T LEAVE ME....... I WILL USE THE BATHROOM NEXTIME!!!!!!!
She can't run fast enough.... :D :D :D
She hates to go shopping with me. It is quite funny when a 35 year old man is chasing his 67 year old gray haired mom throught the store.. :D :D :D

[Mrs. Bordsmnj]

Originally posted by Keithb87
When I go shopping with my Mom, I still will let her get ahead of me and then I 'll yell with a retarded tone.....Dragging one foot....
MOMMY MOMMY DON"T LEAVE ME....... I WILL USE THE BATHROOM NEXTIME!!!!!!!
She can't run fast enough.... :D :D :D
She hates to go shopping with me. It is quite funny when a 35 year old man is chasing his 67 year old gray haired mom throught the store.. :D :D :D
LMAO!
:D

[Infomaniac]

We like to "leave a surprise" for an unsuspecting shopper that goes down a isle that we were just in. An invisible odor just waiting for them.
:) :)

[BADBLOWN572]

Back when I was about 13, I was at K-Mart with a friend of my mom's who was being a real bitch. The K-Mart was packed! She just started pissing me off so I started screwing with her. I would go grab the large bouncy balls in toys and start bouncing them as high as they would go while laughing as loud as I could. Needless to say it got everyone's attention. When she came over to get me she headed straight for me and you could tell she was pissed! I instantly dropped down on the ground into the fetal position and started screaming "no mommy please don't beat me." She grabbed me and walked me over to the front of the store and told me that if I moved from the location that she told me to stay in I was dead meat. Well, she left me alone so I went and got a box of condoms. When she was up at the checkout isle, I walked up and said, "Mommy is this what you use to prevent accidents like me?" Her face was as read as a tomato and everyone in the store thought that she was the worst mother in the world. She was furious! She got so mad, that she actually called my mom and told her to come and get me. When my mom found out she laughed her ass off because she could visualize her friend being that pissed. Even now when her friend gets bitchy, I say, "Remeber K-Mart? I am now older and wiser and K-mart was just the beginning if you want to play with me."

[Kilrtoy]

Check out hot chicks with NO teeth

[LASERRAY]

16. Ask the Wal-Mart Greeter how in the hell does he justify his salary.

[JetBoatRich]

Originally posted by Infomaniac
We like to "leave a surprise" for an unsuspecting shopper that goes down a isle that we were just in. An invisible odor just waiting for them.
:) :)
I get blamed for that all the time:o

[MJ19]

Note to self:
Leave Miller at home when shopping at Wally World :)

[Doug H.]

Rich does this little trick at HallettDave's house and i tell him to stay put but he insists on moving around so it'll follow him, what are friends for :D

[THE VIKING]

Why not just find a toilet and masturbate like people do in Denmark????

[Kilrtoy]

Good one VIKING