Mandelon
04-11-2004, 07:02 PM
I picked this disturbing tale off a site I visit for work stuff. Really sad !!!
Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2004 3:31 pm Post subject: I am not insane! My family needs help!
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I am at the end of my rope. In November of 2003 my true hell started and it isn't getting any better. I have four children from the ages of 3 to 11 years and a husband of twelve years. On November second I noticed a very large pimple on my right cheek which appeared to be a white head. It was something to pop so I did. I had the darkest brownish thick jelly like substance come out of it and I was disgusted, thinking that my pores were filthy. Immediately I noticed the area around this "pimple" started emerging with other pimples.....I did what I had always done in the past. I used a soft wet washcloth and started to "exfoliate" my face with it. I could not believe the things that were coming out of my pores! I thought they were just blackheads but none that I had ever seen before. They were all the same shape, like seeds but the colors ranged from white, tan, dark brown, black and even red. The sizes were tiny to "I can't believe something that big just popped out of my pore!" About two hours later my face was tingling and then intensely burning and throbbing. I could literally feel my face growing but only on my right side. When I looked in the mirror I was horrified. It looked like I had taken my skin off of my right side comlpletely....I was embarrassed and in pain and thought I was losing it. I had done nothing I wouldn't have done at any other time and had never seen this result. I held ice on my face and took 1000 mg of ibuprofen for the pain and it did nothing. Later in the night my scalp became crusty and swollen. I felt bumbps here and there and it seemed like with effluerage that lint was coming out of my pores. The lint was dark blue and wet but definately lint. I tried to ignore it as I felt insane. The next morning I looked so aweful. I had major fluid retention that went from my entire scalp down the right side of my face and neck and down both arms. I had no history of swelling not even in any pregnancy. The swollen areas appeared a greenish gray pale look.
I ached so badly more intensely than any pain I knew and everywhere. I craved the hot shower and when I took them I just would rub myself and as I would I could smell an odor like none I ever smelled before and "lint and seeds" would just pop out of my pores. The "lint" was blue and red and the "seeds" still the varying colors. I would spend hours in the bathroom debreeding my face as my open flesh seemed to attract more disgusting pieces and as they emerged my skin would burn and sting. Some of the "seeds" were squishy and some were hard as tiny pebbles. Covering the wounds made them grow more. I went to the doctor and I was told that I had an allergic reaction to lotion. My complaints and detailed description of what was occuring was not paid attention to. I was given a lotion to apply to the wound and an antibiotic for the infection.
Nothing improved it only got worse. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat....when I would eat the minute my food hit my stomach I would vomit. There was no stomach acid just a sweet wierd taste and the smell was identical to the smell my skin was producing. My heart was always pounding, I was ridden with anxiety, I found myslf crying and talking to myself......when I finally relayed all of my symptoms to my husband I felt even more insane. He looked at me with deep worry and pity and all he could say was how worried he was about me.....he didn't want to notice any physical details, he wouldn't look at the things coming out of my skin. I went home to my mothers.
My Mom noticed the color and my swelling right away and she was apalled. I broke down in tears and she took me to her doctor right away. I was diagnosed with impetigo and possible cellulitis and given an injection of relafen with a prescription for antibiotics, oral and topical and pain medication. I never mentioned the things coming out of my skin because I questioned my own sanity at this point. I started to get better the last day of my antibiotic course, I was healing up and the swelling went down but two days later it all came back but twofold and throughout my entire body. I went to the emergency room. The attending doctor was very sympathetic and caring. I was put on IV antibiotics and pain meds and tested for a staph infection. The DR. was puzzled that I did not have a fever and that my white cells weren't elevated and we had a few days to wait on the staph results. He chose not to admit me because of his concern for a secondary infection so I was sent home with more antibiotics and pain meds. Again, I got a little better but not enough. One morning I awoke after my two hours of sleep and my feet looked like balloons. There was literally a shelf from my ankle down and of course the color was the pale greenish gray hue. Large sticky brown "seeds" would squish out of my feet as I walked and no one wanted to acknowledge this. I was just insane. Some thought I was on drugs but no one wanted to really see what I was going though. My third solid week of no eating and I had gained 30 pounds, all fluid. When I would have hot flashes I would sweat syrup. It was thicker than normal prespiration and brownish with a heavy scent. I awoke one day and realized that the
"seeds" were coming out of the inside of my eyes. My eyes were burning, and the whites were a yellowish tan, I just knew I was going to die. I sat down and wrote out all of my symptoms and the course my sickness had taken so far....I notices that all four of my children looked puffy, and they had the greenish pale hue around thier eyes and mouths. My husband's fuse was shorter and I could see this ridge on his upper forehead that was the same pale color and I realized he had been picking this one area on his scalp for at least a week. He always had his hand on his head like a monkey, that visual will always be etched in my mind. I put some gloves on and offered the kids backrubs. Low and behold "Lint" came out of each and every one of my children. I did the same to my husband and he also had the "lint". I demanded to bring the whole family to the ER and my husband wouldn't allow it. He wouldn't believe it and he said I was scaring the kids.
I went by myself, at the end of my rope and knowing that I was going to die if I couldn't get help. I brought my play by play write up for the doc and when he came in my first statement to him was "Please doctor, you have to listen to me carefully, I am going to die. If I am indeed insane then you have to find me help and If you agree I am sick I need the proper diagnoses but either way if I go on with no help I will die" I had tears streaming out of my eyes. I started to refer to my history write up and he cut me off and said "well I looked up our records of your last visit and your staph test is negative, so I think you have scabies....and it isn't fatal and it isn't systemic." he proceeded to ask if I had a concentration of sores between my fingers and toes, my armpits and genitalia and did they itch. I said no to them all and he still insisted that I had scabies. I asked about the weight gain and fluid retention and the things coming out of my skin. All he could say was "Do you do street drugs?" I was so offended and hurt. He cut me off and left. I was nearly hysterically crying. The nurse came in with th e prescription directions and the scabies hand out and I told her I didn't need it, I knew it wasn't that and I couldn't believe how many times I had reached out for help and no one would listen. I felt so desperate. I went home and cried for hours, my husband was sympathetic but not helpful, he still wouldn't look for himself at what was occuring underneath my skin. I prayed to God that someone could help my family and I had resolved to dying. I just wanted to sleep into my death. I slept for two days solid. I woke up and most of the fluid retention was gone. I had dropped twenty pounds in two days. I still had sores and pain and the paleness though. I went to my youngest child for a hug and she had a large white head on her cheek that looked all too familiar. I took her right in to the pediatrician.
I gave him my history and he looked at my wounds and thought it looked just like staph. He said there was a type that would not show up on a test and I wouldn't necessarily have to run a fever. He did say it was hard to get rid of and that a longer course of heavy antibiotics were necessary. He prescribed them for everyone in the family and I thought I had been cured. It took me four weeks after this to finally begin to eat again. I had to gradually force myself to eat a bite of food every two hours. It was painful. About two weeks later I was back on small meals and doing well and then the day before new years eve it came back. I had no sores but there was swelling, pain and muscle twitching, spasms the paleness. my feet were the worst and I could not walk I had to crawl for two days. This time the swelling didn't look like just one big mass it looked like a tortuous trail throughout my entire body. I got sudden migranes where I would hear voices echo when nobody was talking and the room would spin and I had to clech on to the bed as I felt I was going to fling off of it. I saw the kids and they were showing signs, My husband finally admitted that he thought "wierd stuff" was coming out of his sore on his scalp...I went back to the pediatrician but no one had sores. I told him that the strange materials were coming out of everyone's feet and he seemed puzzled he said he saw no signs of staph but agreed to prescribe antibiotic again.
Again improvement but new onset at the end of the antibiotic course. For the third time I got this outbreak I started to notice the lines on the walls and the things coming out of the carpets by the walls and growing in the window sills they looked all too familiar. The bathroom always smelled like the fluid out of my skin even before I ever became sick. Lines on the walls underneath the paint were the same shape as the swelling underneath my skin. In a matter of days I started to notice the paint chipping and falling off the walls in certain areas and later I noticed the mold emerging. One day I tried wiping a spot that was raised on the wall and much like my skin, the wall had a sticky brownish matter come out of it. I now realize that this is a mold and it is everywhere. It is eating our seashells our furniture, the wood, the grout and the tile, the plants, it has ruined our shoes and some clothing. All of the children's socks have brownish seed shaped stains. Currently my husband and I are truly suffering, in the middle of an outbreak. Material emerges from everywhere....eyes, nose, mouth fingernails, toenails, skin, tongue, I know it is internal too as I have seen evidence in all of our fecal matter. This time I have sores again on top of the scars I have accrued from past outbreaks.
I hate my memory, I get frustrated and angered easily, I can't sleep even though I am so tired, I can't work, my husband lost his job, we moved from our old home in with my mother in her brand new home and now I see that her cement and grout and walls are infected.
I have a little relief that I know I am not insane but only because my husband has this affliction himself and he cannot ignore or deny the strangeness. The outside world however still offers no help. I am either a lost druggie or insane. My husbands parents truly think that we may be lost to drugs. It took my Mom to see what comes out of my skin to believe and thank God she finally believes.
My hair had started to fall out in a strip down the middle of my head, The other day my husband had a dead battery in his pocket and it heated up by itself. When we are close to the mold on something or close to eachother we feel surges of activity our bodies, stinging, burning, poking, our skin crawls, materials emerge. There are cycles in the day where our extremities turn ice cold and dark gray and numb. Our skin texture changes and feels like it could just melt away (explaining why my exfoliatiion attemp in the beggining resulted so terribly). Sometimes I even notice how dilated everyone's pupils are.....always when the "surges" occur. We need help. It is horrible to see everything being destroyed around us. We are not dramatic people either. Normally healthy, mellow and happy we have changed to confused, angry, dysfunctional and hopeless. This is not us and we are not insane. I need any and every bit of advise I can get, we need treatment. I believe my husband and I may have permanent effects I pray that my children are spared. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
By the way, My husband is thirty two, I am twenty nine, my son is elleven, my daughters are 8, 6 and 3. We live in Northern California
Posted: Sat Mar 20, 2004 3:31 pm Post subject: I am not insane! My family needs help!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I am at the end of my rope. In November of 2003 my true hell started and it isn't getting any better. I have four children from the ages of 3 to 11 years and a husband of twelve years. On November second I noticed a very large pimple on my right cheek which appeared to be a white head. It was something to pop so I did. I had the darkest brownish thick jelly like substance come out of it and I was disgusted, thinking that my pores were filthy. Immediately I noticed the area around this "pimple" started emerging with other pimples.....I did what I had always done in the past. I used a soft wet washcloth and started to "exfoliate" my face with it. I could not believe the things that were coming out of my pores! I thought they were just blackheads but none that I had ever seen before. They were all the same shape, like seeds but the colors ranged from white, tan, dark brown, black and even red. The sizes were tiny to "I can't believe something that big just popped out of my pore!" About two hours later my face was tingling and then intensely burning and throbbing. I could literally feel my face growing but only on my right side. When I looked in the mirror I was horrified. It looked like I had taken my skin off of my right side comlpletely....I was embarrassed and in pain and thought I was losing it. I had done nothing I wouldn't have done at any other time and had never seen this result. I held ice on my face and took 1000 mg of ibuprofen for the pain and it did nothing. Later in the night my scalp became crusty and swollen. I felt bumbps here and there and it seemed like with effluerage that lint was coming out of my pores. The lint was dark blue and wet but definately lint. I tried to ignore it as I felt insane. The next morning I looked so aweful. I had major fluid retention that went from my entire scalp down the right side of my face and neck and down both arms. I had no history of swelling not even in any pregnancy. The swollen areas appeared a greenish gray pale look.
I ached so badly more intensely than any pain I knew and everywhere. I craved the hot shower and when I took them I just would rub myself and as I would I could smell an odor like none I ever smelled before and "lint and seeds" would just pop out of my pores. The "lint" was blue and red and the "seeds" still the varying colors. I would spend hours in the bathroom debreeding my face as my open flesh seemed to attract more disgusting pieces and as they emerged my skin would burn and sting. Some of the "seeds" were squishy and some were hard as tiny pebbles. Covering the wounds made them grow more. I went to the doctor and I was told that I had an allergic reaction to lotion. My complaints and detailed description of what was occuring was not paid attention to. I was given a lotion to apply to the wound and an antibiotic for the infection.
Nothing improved it only got worse. I couldn't sleep, I couldn't eat....when I would eat the minute my food hit my stomach I would vomit. There was no stomach acid just a sweet wierd taste and the smell was identical to the smell my skin was producing. My heart was always pounding, I was ridden with anxiety, I found myslf crying and talking to myself......when I finally relayed all of my symptoms to my husband I felt even more insane. He looked at me with deep worry and pity and all he could say was how worried he was about me.....he didn't want to notice any physical details, he wouldn't look at the things coming out of my skin. I went home to my mothers.
My Mom noticed the color and my swelling right away and she was apalled. I broke down in tears and she took me to her doctor right away. I was diagnosed with impetigo and possible cellulitis and given an injection of relafen with a prescription for antibiotics, oral and topical and pain medication. I never mentioned the things coming out of my skin because I questioned my own sanity at this point. I started to get better the last day of my antibiotic course, I was healing up and the swelling went down but two days later it all came back but twofold and throughout my entire body. I went to the emergency room. The attending doctor was very sympathetic and caring. I was put on IV antibiotics and pain meds and tested for a staph infection. The DR. was puzzled that I did not have a fever and that my white cells weren't elevated and we had a few days to wait on the staph results. He chose not to admit me because of his concern for a secondary infection so I was sent home with more antibiotics and pain meds. Again, I got a little better but not enough. One morning I awoke after my two hours of sleep and my feet looked like balloons. There was literally a shelf from my ankle down and of course the color was the pale greenish gray hue. Large sticky brown "seeds" would squish out of my feet as I walked and no one wanted to acknowledge this. I was just insane. Some thought I was on drugs but no one wanted to really see what I was going though. My third solid week of no eating and I had gained 30 pounds, all fluid. When I would have hot flashes I would sweat syrup. It was thicker than normal prespiration and brownish with a heavy scent. I awoke one day and realized that the
"seeds" were coming out of the inside of my eyes. My eyes were burning, and the whites were a yellowish tan, I just knew I was going to die. I sat down and wrote out all of my symptoms and the course my sickness had taken so far....I notices that all four of my children looked puffy, and they had the greenish pale hue around thier eyes and mouths. My husband's fuse was shorter and I could see this ridge on his upper forehead that was the same pale color and I realized he had been picking this one area on his scalp for at least a week. He always had his hand on his head like a monkey, that visual will always be etched in my mind. I put some gloves on and offered the kids backrubs. Low and behold "Lint" came out of each and every one of my children. I did the same to my husband and he also had the "lint". I demanded to bring the whole family to the ER and my husband wouldn't allow it. He wouldn't believe it and he said I was scaring the kids.
I went by myself, at the end of my rope and knowing that I was going to die if I couldn't get help. I brought my play by play write up for the doc and when he came in my first statement to him was "Please doctor, you have to listen to me carefully, I am going to die. If I am indeed insane then you have to find me help and If you agree I am sick I need the proper diagnoses but either way if I go on with no help I will die" I had tears streaming out of my eyes. I started to refer to my history write up and he cut me off and said "well I looked up our records of your last visit and your staph test is negative, so I think you have scabies....and it isn't fatal and it isn't systemic." he proceeded to ask if I had a concentration of sores between my fingers and toes, my armpits and genitalia and did they itch. I said no to them all and he still insisted that I had scabies. I asked about the weight gain and fluid retention and the things coming out of my skin. All he could say was "Do you do street drugs?" I was so offended and hurt. He cut me off and left. I was nearly hysterically crying. The nurse came in with th e prescription directions and the scabies hand out and I told her I didn't need it, I knew it wasn't that and I couldn't believe how many times I had reached out for help and no one would listen. I felt so desperate. I went home and cried for hours, my husband was sympathetic but not helpful, he still wouldn't look for himself at what was occuring underneath my skin. I prayed to God that someone could help my family and I had resolved to dying. I just wanted to sleep into my death. I slept for two days solid. I woke up and most of the fluid retention was gone. I had dropped twenty pounds in two days. I still had sores and pain and the paleness though. I went to my youngest child for a hug and she had a large white head on her cheek that looked all too familiar. I took her right in to the pediatrician.
I gave him my history and he looked at my wounds and thought it looked just like staph. He said there was a type that would not show up on a test and I wouldn't necessarily have to run a fever. He did say it was hard to get rid of and that a longer course of heavy antibiotics were necessary. He prescribed them for everyone in the family and I thought I had been cured. It took me four weeks after this to finally begin to eat again. I had to gradually force myself to eat a bite of food every two hours. It was painful. About two weeks later I was back on small meals and doing well and then the day before new years eve it came back. I had no sores but there was swelling, pain and muscle twitching, spasms the paleness. my feet were the worst and I could not walk I had to crawl for two days. This time the swelling didn't look like just one big mass it looked like a tortuous trail throughout my entire body. I got sudden migranes where I would hear voices echo when nobody was talking and the room would spin and I had to clech on to the bed as I felt I was going to fling off of it. I saw the kids and they were showing signs, My husband finally admitted that he thought "wierd stuff" was coming out of his sore on his scalp...I went back to the pediatrician but no one had sores. I told him that the strange materials were coming out of everyone's feet and he seemed puzzled he said he saw no signs of staph but agreed to prescribe antibiotic again.
Again improvement but new onset at the end of the antibiotic course. For the third time I got this outbreak I started to notice the lines on the walls and the things coming out of the carpets by the walls and growing in the window sills they looked all too familiar. The bathroom always smelled like the fluid out of my skin even before I ever became sick. Lines on the walls underneath the paint were the same shape as the swelling underneath my skin. In a matter of days I started to notice the paint chipping and falling off the walls in certain areas and later I noticed the mold emerging. One day I tried wiping a spot that was raised on the wall and much like my skin, the wall had a sticky brownish matter come out of it. I now realize that this is a mold and it is everywhere. It is eating our seashells our furniture, the wood, the grout and the tile, the plants, it has ruined our shoes and some clothing. All of the children's socks have brownish seed shaped stains. Currently my husband and I are truly suffering, in the middle of an outbreak. Material emerges from everywhere....eyes, nose, mouth fingernails, toenails, skin, tongue, I know it is internal too as I have seen evidence in all of our fecal matter. This time I have sores again on top of the scars I have accrued from past outbreaks.
I hate my memory, I get frustrated and angered easily, I can't sleep even though I am so tired, I can't work, my husband lost his job, we moved from our old home in with my mother in her brand new home and now I see that her cement and grout and walls are infected.
I have a little relief that I know I am not insane but only because my husband has this affliction himself and he cannot ignore or deny the strangeness. The outside world however still offers no help. I am either a lost druggie or insane. My husbands parents truly think that we may be lost to drugs. It took my Mom to see what comes out of my skin to believe and thank God she finally believes.
My hair had started to fall out in a strip down the middle of my head, The other day my husband had a dead battery in his pocket and it heated up by itself. When we are close to the mold on something or close to eachother we feel surges of activity our bodies, stinging, burning, poking, our skin crawls, materials emerge. There are cycles in the day where our extremities turn ice cold and dark gray and numb. Our skin texture changes and feels like it could just melt away (explaining why my exfoliatiion attemp in the beggining resulted so terribly). Sometimes I even notice how dilated everyone's pupils are.....always when the "surges" occur. We need help. It is horrible to see everything being destroyed around us. We are not dramatic people either. Normally healthy, mellow and happy we have changed to confused, angry, dysfunctional and hopeless. This is not us and we are not insane. I need any and every bit of advise I can get, we need treatment. I believe my husband and I may have permanent effects I pray that my children are spared. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
By the way, My husband is thirty two, I am twenty nine, my son is elleven, my daughters are 8, 6 and 3. We live in Northern California