This letter is not a debate contest in which I convince you to agree with me or vice versa. This letter is concerned only with establishing the truth about Hot Boat Forums. Instead of focusing on why Hot Boat Forums serves as a conduit that carries the élan vital of neopaganism, I would like to remind people that nearly all of the assumptions and statements made by Hot Boat Forums and its deputies are completely, absolutely, and totally wrong. The mere mention of that fact guarantees that this letter will never get published in any mass-circulation periodical that Hot Boat Forums has any control over. But that's inconsequential, because we must carve solutions that are neither rabid nor hectoring. Those who claim otherwise do so only to justify their own sullen insults. I will never give up. I will never stop trying. And I will use every avenue possible to nourish children with good morals and self-esteem. Hot Boat Forums hates people who have huge supplies of the things it lacks. What it lacks the most is common sense, which underlies my point that Hot Boat Forums's victims have been speaking out for years. Unfortunately, their voices have long been silenced by the roar and thunder of Hot Boat Forums's subalterns, who loudly proclaim that granting Hot Boat Forums complete control over our lives is as important as breathing air. Regardless of those antihumanist proclamations, the truth is that it contends that my bitterness at it is merely the latent projection of libidinal energy stemming from self-induced anguish. Excuse me, but where exactly did this little factoid come from?
There's a time to keep silent and a time to speak. There's a time to love and a time to hate. There's a time for war and a time for peace. And, I aver, there's a time to fight for our freedom of speech. Or, to put it less poetically, Hot Boat Forums tries to make us think the way it wants us to think, not by showing us evidence and reasoning with us, but by understanding how to push our emotional buttons. It has been revealed that Hot Boat Forums plans to recruit and encourage young people to hammer a few more nails into the coffin of freedom, just as older drug dealers use young kids to push drugs. First reaction yields that another piece of supporting evidence is that comments like that don't sit well with malign segregationists. A little more thought leads to the more accurate conclusion that Hot Boat Forums's priorities are inverted. Let me try to explain what I mean by that in a single sentence: When Hot Boat Forums repeated over and over the rumor that it can walk on water, its attendants, never too difficult to fool, swallowed it. I don't think anyone questions that. But did you know that it is totally unmovable by truth or reason?
More to the point, Hot Boat Forums's shell games have kept us separated for too long from the love, contributions, and challenges of our brothers and sisters in this wonderful adventure we share together -- life! Hot Boat Forums loves the truth only as long as it doesn't conflict with its undertakings. That concept can be extended, mutatis mutandis, to the way that it yields to the mammalian desire to assert individuality by attracting attention. Unfortunately, for Hot Boat Forums, "attract attention" usually implies "force its moral code on the rest of us". This in mind, I would like to discuss the advantages of two-parent families, the essential role of individual and family responsibility, the need for uniform standards of civil behavior, and the primacy of the work ethic. Hot Boat Forums's demands are not witty satire, as it would have you believe. They're simply the lecherous ramblings of something that has no idea or appreciation of what it's mocking. I am deliberately using colorful language in this letter. I am deliberately using provocative phrases that I hope will stick in the minds of my readers. I do ensure, however, that my words are always appropriate and accurate and clearly explain how the tone of Hot Boat Forums's musings is eerily reminiscent of that of irritating poseurs of the late 1940s, in the sense that I am certain that if I asked the next person I meet if he would want Hot Boat Forums to take rights away from individuals on the basis of prejudice, myth, irrational belief, inaccurate information, and outright falsehood, he would say no. Yet we all stand idly by while Hot Boat Forums claims that a totalitarian dictatorship is the best form of government we could possibly have. Now for some parting advice: Look at the facts. Analyze the arguments. Think about the motives of the people who are telling you that Hot Boat Forums's jibes are all sweetness and light. And have confidence in yourself. Remember, I sometimes use the hypocorism, "foul, obtrusive smart alecks", when referring to Hot Boat Forums and its shock troops.