Curfew will depend on the child. I have 3 boys 21,19 and 14. Its also how they have been raised. My 21 year old never had a curfew. He just had to call at 11 pm and let us know what's happening. My 19 year old we keep on a tight string, he loves life too much. Trust is hard have with kids while their hormones are raging. Try to strike a balance with your kids.
They're 18 and 19, they can vote, join the military and go off to war, but they have a curfew??
I'm with Ike. A curfew of any kind doesn't seem reasonable to me at 18+ years of age.
Sure, you can make up whatever rules you want but I hear you asking if you're being reasonable and a curfew doesn't seem reasonable to me. In fact, I think it's awesome they are honoring it at all. I rebelled heavily at that age and would have ignored it and paid whatever consequences were required.
well I don't really have the right to comment because my kids are only 12 and 13.. But When I was younger my cerfew until I moved out was 12:00. No matter what on the weekends and I couldn't go out on the weekdays.
I moved out at 17.
I attended 2 yrs of college and worked so it was rough but it was tough love.
I think I came out fine. Maybe, don't know.
I think if they are doing good and not trouble makers give them a chance if they screw up then take away the time you gave them. If they did move out would you worry more? Be glad you have your eye on them right now. When they move out you won't know 1/2 of what you do know.
They sound like good kids and if they have not got in trouble I think they have earned a little more time.
Let em do what they want... I think there should be rules as far as not waking anyone up if they come home late. I know it really pisses my son off if I come stumbling in at 3am with some chick and wake him up when he has to go to work the next morning...
I'm with Ike. A curfew of any kind doesn't seem reasonable to me at 18+ years of age.
Sure, you can make up whatever rules you want but I hear you asking if you're being reasonable and a curfew doesn't seem reasonable to me. In fact, I think it's awesome they are honoring it at all. I rebelled heavily at that age and would have ignored it and paid whatever consequences were required.
that's why it's my house if they don't like it i'm sorry to say "don't let the door hit them on the way out........
that's why it's my house if they don't like it i'm sorry to say "don't let the door hit them on the way out........
Most guys I see like you usually have a wife that wears the pants in the family... so you have to enforce what little authority you may have on something, which unfortunately is usually your kids, even when there is no reason for it, except something as pathetic as "It's my house" http://www.***boat.com/ubb/rolleyes.gif
My son hasn't had a curfew since he started driving at age 16. The only rules were he had to go to school and he had to go to work. As long as he helps with things around the house, we're cool.
What do you want to do?
How do you expect the kids handle this?
Talk to them, and come up with a joint solution between you and them, not ***boats...you may have to give in and give them a chance to prove themselves.
They sound like good kids...talk to them, when you are done, talk to them some more!!!
I'd loosen the reigns a little. They are adults, though young adults, and you can't keep them under lock and key forever. They need to grow and become responsible on their own too. Like others said, if they're good and not doing anything stupid, cut them the slack they should have. If they screw up, they pay the consequences and stick to those consequences. If they are working, going to school, managing their own bank accounts (what little would go in there) like reasonable adults then I don't see why they would need an adolescent curfew IMO.
Give them a chance until they prove otherwise. Let them stay out til 12:00 on weekdays and 1:00 - 2:00 on weekends. Eventually, they will get tired of it if they have to get up early. My curfew was always 2:00 when I lived with my parents. If something was going on later then 2:00 and I wanted to be there, I called and told my parents what was going on. You can always try extending their curfew a half-hour or hour every 6 - 12 months. Make them earn it based on behavior and so forth. Ultimately, it is your house and they need to abide by your rules. Good luck!
I think the times you have set are perfect. Unless they are going midnight bowling or to a movie, (or on a case by case basis) you can adjust times and have them call when they are on their way home so you know when to expect them. What else are any kids under the age of 21 going to do after midnight?? Nothing. So there is nothing to be upset about?? The kid's today will try and push the boundaries and limits if allowed. As long as they are under your roof, it is your rules. If they don't like it get a job and move out, that is what I tell my son. My son is going to be a Junior this year. His curfew is 11:00.
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