Two guys meet after the war (WW II). They give each other a huge hug and go for a few beers. They start their regular small talk, until one asks “Say, how did things go down where you were fighting?”. The other guy answers, “Well, as you can see, both my legs got shot, real bad, so I’ll have to wear these crutches for the rest of my life……….but we TOOK that DAMN Remagen bridge. What about you?”. The other one answers “well, you are in far BETTER shape than I am”. His buddy opens his eyes wide in disbelief, asking “say wut?????? You are still a complete man, look how I ended up!!!!!! ” The other guy answers (rather sadly) “Well, I was in North Africa, when I got hit. You DON’T have the faintest idea WHERE I got it…………..”. His friend asks “Were you emasculated then?”. The guy answers calmly “Not exactly. When I was hit by shrapnel a little baby elephant died instantly, right next to me. So they managed to attach its little trunk where my manhood was supposed to be, so I wouldn’t bleed to death. But I HAVE a problem still………………wait until they start bringing the snacks. That little dirty $%&$$%#$%& trunk the first thing it’s gonna do, is grab a bunch of peanuts and stuff’em right up my ass”